For my previous wedding Wednesday posts I've mentioned how the absence of my mother affected the wedding, but for a much more upbeat tone today I'm sharing about the wedding fun with my Dad, who was not only there but hosted the whole thing - yay Dad!
Dad and his two daughters
For years my Dad liked to joke that he'd be happy to host my wedding one day - at the waffle house , and thanks to the internet I was able to see that some people do in fact actually do that. Luckily for us when Shaun and I become engaged my Dad quickly got a bit more serious on what he was and wasn't willing to host. Regardless of the type of wedding we had my Dad's budget was firm but he was willing to and in fact would have preferred to give us the cash if we came in under budget and it was tempting, very tempting, to have a small dinner and go house hunting with the cash but for some reason I'm ok with my Dad hosting a big party but taking money for a house seemed wrong, plus we have the rest of our life to buy houses but we're only getting married once so we went the party route and luckily my Dad was on board. Unlike a lot of Dads my Dad was very involved in the process - he came on the first dress appointment but then didn't see the dress again until I did a first look with him at the wedding.
Seeing the final look
In the bridal suite
Dad also came with us to visit venues - this is actually where we started in the wedding process. Once we got engaged I researched about 40 venues in town and brought info sheets with price, capacity, a photo and pro and cons for 10 venues that represented a wide variety of what was available in Memphis - seeing the cost of how much it cost to rent a venue for one day was a bit shocking to my Dad he thought The Cadre was beautiful but when I told him it's an $8,000 rental (that's just for the space for you out of towners where other things included with the venue is the norm) it was a quick no way (I didn't even include the Cadre in my 10 info sheet places to consider but fun fact - neither was the venue we ultimately choose). Surprisingly to me Dad was not just hey let's go with the one with the lowest price and we wound up visiting six venues. He also was there for the photographer interviews and caterer tastings but stopped short of attending any bridal shows.
At our venue that we all loved
For the most part Dad was pretty cool with the choices we made - he thought 5 bridesmaids was a lot even though I pointed out lots of southern brides have 10 or 12 and thought the bridesmaid's dresses were too much - the actual phrase "solid gold backup dancers" was used through-out the planning process and he thought having a photo booth was carnival-esque but went with it. In the end there were only two things that got shoot down - for music our first thought was to have an singer / instrumental duo but Dad didn't think that would be good for dancing, he was probably right on that one. We also REALLY wanted to have greenery on the chandeliers and no matter how many pictures of beautiful, upscale wedding with chandelier greenery he was firm in his opinion that it was tacky and we would not have it - as it turns out the venue had issues with a previous wedding hanging things from the chandeliers so it was no longer allowed - it would have been pretty but you know what - we're just as married as if we had had it.
When it cam time for my walk down the aisle there was never a doubt in my mind that I wanted to walk with my father. I know some brides consider this old fashioned and a throw back to when women were quite literally "given away" but I think it honors the love and support I have received through out my life.
Right before we walked down the aisle
Here comes the bride
Although it's not the norm in Memphis we did toasts during the wedding after dinner and my Dad gave the perfect toast that balances sentiment, a little humor but overall his happiness in welcoming Shaun into the family. Shaun and my Dad actually get along really well, if only my Dad liked football they would probably hang out every single weekend.
Just two bros hanging out
Most people who were at the wedding find this surprising but my Dad is actually not a very social person and I think he was honestly surprised at how much fun he had at the wedding. Seriously y'all, my Dad is one of the most fiscally conservative people I know so I was concerned that he would regret hosting the wedding but I think the evidence proves a great time was had by all but especially my Dad.
Getting his groove on
Father Daughter Dance
Yes, this is the face of a homebody - he hides it well